The Insiders Guide on How to be a ‘Real’ Mountain Biker

A tongue in cheek guide to the look, the lingo and the lifestyle you'll need to adopt if you want to be a 'real' mountain biker.

I was once chased halfway round a trail on a night ride by an angry badger. They go damn fast. True story.

However, angry badgers are thankfully relatively rare. What might be less rare are angry farmers or landowners, potentially wielding weapons. Why would they be angry? Is it because you’ve ventured on to their private land, perchance?

Stick to trail centres, bridle paths, or areas where you know there’s open access. Venturing on to private land and getting caught at best means a frantic pedal to safety. Oh, and it’s illegal.


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