The Insiders Guide on How to be a ‘Real’ Mountain Biker

A tongue in cheek guide to the look, the lingo and the lifestyle you'll need to adopt if you want to be a 'real' mountain biker.

The post-ride tea and cake is a critical part of the ride experience. It is fundamental that you take time to sit in the trail centre and defrost (or let the mud dry off) and talk about how amazing your riding/the trail/your bike/the kit was. Planning the next ride trip is also best done here.

The quality of a trail centre can be judged on its cake. The very best will not only have an excellent home-made confections, they may even have gluten-free and vegan options.

To make your survey of trails centres more scientific, pick one type of cake to trial. I find the chocolate brownie is a good choice.

Although tea (or a ‘brew’ as it is often known) is the beverage of choice, feel free to switch to hot chocolate, ideally with marshmallows, if the ride has been particularly hard or cold. Or if you fancy it.

NOTE: Coffee is usually the preserve of road cyclists.


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