A particularly excellent idea if you have a very mean-looking machine that you don’t mind referring to from here on in as ‘Mr Sparkles’.

Kids and Cyclo Cross: Everything you need to know

It’s a great way of putting a pin in a partner’s ego too: tell him that he’s being mean if he doesn’t let his nephew name it, and then titter for eternity over the fact his Pinarello is called ‘Fireman Sam’.