True, we probably could have come up with a more elegant headline - but really the words 'massive', 'sale' and 'cycles' probably cover it.
It won't be pretty, there probably won't be mannequins or well lit changing rooms - but there will be no fewer than 5,000 reduced bikes and 50,000 reduced garments in a marquee in Gatwick this month.
Evans Cycles are having a bit of a garage sale, clearing out their warehouse with the help of a 15,000 sq foot marquee in a neighboring field.
We're not sure if we're impressed or skeptical by the neatness of 5,000 bikes, 50,000 garments and 15,000 ft in the same sentence, but honestly, it'll be a lot of gear regardless of rounding up or down.
The high street and online retailer haven't hosted a sale like this for some years, but no word of a lie, riders around the Surrey/Sussex border are still heard remarking on bargains they acquired at the last one.
The sale will begin on September 26, and continue until October 11 - just outside the Headquarters at James Watt Way, Crawley RH10 9TZ.
After more bargains? Check out the Aldi Specialbuys range coming to stores near you this month.