Leg shaving awareness
Did you know that 99.99% of all stress incurred by a woman is a direct result of her thinking about her body hair? Ok, that's not true. But it may as well be. Sometimes we have nightmares about it. A friend of ours shaved her legs in a Starbucks toilet before graduation. Madness.
So what could be better for your ego than finally having another person around that understands the struggles involved with the (let's face it) almost daily upkeep required in pursuit of hairless skin? We love having relationships with other cyclists because fighting over bathroom time is kinda sweet. Also – everyone is just so goddam smooth.
Free mechanical work
Before you get up in arms – no, we do not mean that as a 'helpless woman' you require the skills and know-how of an 'obviously' technically 'superior' male. No.
Instead we mean that, at least at the very beginning of the relationships, you could possibly take a few liberties. If you're into guys, you'll know that if you just make a few sighs as you're doing a maintenance task, he'll leap in to lend a hand. Slowly, you start doing less of the maintenance to begin with, and more of the sighing. Before you know it, you have your own in-house mechanic. Someway later down the line you can reveal that you're actually an incredibly handy, but totally lazy, lady.
It just lies around, beans spilling from every cupboard. Start dating a true cyclist and you'll soon discover coffee under your finger nails, and a yummy warmth in your belly. Because nothing is better than being in a relationship with someone that has the disposable income and borderline-obsessive behaviour.
Simply put: cyclists must have the best things in life. And if that involves our mouths being caressed by foamy lattes while our other half practices steaming techniques, then we suppose we'll survive.
Free bike parts!
If you're dating a tech-enthralled cyclist, there's a strong likelihood that he'll change something on his bicycle every other week in order to make his machine lighter, faster and more carbon-y.
If you manage to be around during this process, then throw a big smile in their direction, with eyes that say 'my poor old bike could really do with some new bars'. Next thing you know you're riding their old bike that only came out last year. Boom.
Here at TWC we know that cycling on dates can be a risky business. We even wrote a Dos and Don'ts guide to it last year. But when you get over the inevitable awkwardness of those first few rides, a whole world of healthy and enjoyable dates is waiting for you.
You'll never have to go see some rubbish rom com in grotty local cinema again: instead you'll both be egging each other on while seeing some of the most beautiful sights in the country.
You should never worry about what another person makes of your eating habits, and you know this. But let's not pretend that we haven't all been self-conscious about eating in a feminine manner when on a date.
Thankfully cyclists are incredibly understanding when it comes to eating, due to the fact they have to shove gels in their mouth which actually taste like sea creatures.
You can also eat somewhat competitively. Whether you decide to inform your partner that you're playing a game to see who can eat the most pasta is up to you.
Look, cyclists have great glutes. Your butt is involved in the actual action of cycling, and continuously working them results in a backside that's as toned as someone with perfect pitch.
Sure, they might go a bit bow-legged after a long ride, thus rendering their lovely asses invisible. But in daily life their buttocks will shine, iridescent for all to see. The only thing that will make your friend's more jealous is when they realise that your backside is also great, and together you make a frightfully beautiful butt duo.
We've talked a lot in the past about how sex and cycling are fantastic bedfellows. And now is a good time to reinforce the point that cycling makes you happy, which in turn makes you horny.
If you have a partner that also cycles, it's likely that you are currently having incredible sex, all the time. Right? Right.